The Definitive Thread on Dating

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The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby Yuki-Anne » Tue Oct 22, 2013 7:59 pm

Here is the thread where you can post all your troubles about your flagging love life, and the rest of us can give you advice about the opposite sex.

I'll start:

Guys, the ladies love taxidermy. On the first date, be sure to give her the present of the taxidermied head of one of your kills. Preferably, her own cat. She will love you FOREVER.
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby Crossfire » Tue Oct 22, 2013 8:18 pm

Girls love manchildren who act like unsociable jerks. Put on your best scowl and prepare a vocabulary of colourful language, it'll woo them women like nothing else. For increased performance use a witty pickup line such as the classic "does this napkin smell like chloroform to you?".
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby Davidizer13 » Tue Oct 22, 2013 8:36 pm

Women love nothing more than to hear about your adventures at last night's D&D session or 40K match. And go into detail, chicks want to hear about every die roll, every spell or move you considered before picking the right one.
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby DaughterOfZion » Tue Oct 22, 2013 9:05 pm

Yuki-Anne wrote:Guys, the ladies love taxidermy. On the first date, be sure to give her the present of the taxidermied head of one of your kills. Preferably, her own cat. She will love you FOREVER.


Actually, I believe you should give her a soldier squirrel from your Squirrel Army. Women love men who have evil plans to take over the world with their taxidermy squirrel army. It shows her you have ambition.

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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby Xeno » Tue Oct 22, 2013 9:12 pm

Crossfire wrote:Girls love manchildren who act like unsociable jerks. Put on your best scowl and prepare a vocabulary of colourful language, it'll woo them women like nothing else. For increased performance use a witty pickup line such as the classic "does this napkin smell like chloroform to you?".

stop telling people about my tactics
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby Wild Eagle » Tue Oct 22, 2013 9:13 pm

Women love it when you burp loudly, spit in public, and pay no heed to personal hygiene and decorum. It will give you that edgy, I'm-a-total-rebel aura that will make the ladies swoon.
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby Makachop^^128 » Tue Oct 22, 2013 9:22 pm

Oh my goodness O_O this thread is a real thing XDD
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby Okami » Wed Oct 23, 2013 7:52 am

Xeno wrote:
Crossfire wrote:Girls love manchildren who act like unsociable jerks. Put on your best scowl and prepare a vocabulary of colourful language, it'll woo them women like nothing else. For increased performance use a witty pickup line such as the classic "does this napkin smell like chloroform to you?".

stop telling people about my tactics



brb, dying. :lol:
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby Wolfsong » Thu Oct 24, 2013 4:19 pm

Okami wrote:
Xeno wrote:
Crossfire wrote:Girls love manchildren who act like unsociable jerks. Put on your best scowl and prepare a vocabulary of colourful language, it'll woo them women like nothing else. For increased performance use a witty pickup line such as the classic "does this napkin smell like chloroform to you?".

stop telling people about my tactics


brb, dying. :lol:


dying is right... :thumbsdow

...guys, lick the girls. Doesn't have to be on the face. They love it...
eg: :lick:

Here's the likely response:

:lickbash:

...sorry. Ima killjoy.
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby Sheenar » Fri Oct 25, 2013 4:52 pm

Okami wrote:
Xeno wrote:
Crossfire wrote:Girls love manchildren who act like unsociable jerks. Put on your best scowl and prepare a vocabulary of colourful language, it'll woo them women like nothing else. For increased performance use a witty pickup line such as the classic "does this napkin smell like chloroform to you?".

stop telling people about my tactics



brb, dying. :lol:


Me too --HA

Guys, these lines totally work --those womenfolk will be all up ons. ;)
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby S.M.O.G. » Sat Nov 02, 2013 2:35 pm

Davidizer13 wrote:Women love nothing more than to hear about your adventures at last night's D&D session or 40K match. And go into detail, chicks want to hear about every die roll, every spell or move you considered before picking the right one.


And that's why Oddood198 is such a stud.
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby FourFourSeven » Sat Nov 02, 2013 6:08 pm

Women loooove a man with ADHD. It usually means they have total awareness of their surroundings. Well, usually aware of everything else but the girl he's with. But hey, you can't pay attention to- OMG LOOK A PONY!!
"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby Nate » Sun Nov 03, 2013 3:38 am

Cologne and soap can cover up a man's natural pheromones. In order to maximize your studliness and get the women all up ons, be sure to go a couple of days without showering before attempting to woo the ladies.
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby Mr. SmartyPants » Sun Nov 03, 2013 3:24 pm

Always overstep your boundaries.

Be really crass and perverted. This also works wonders.
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby FourFourSeven » Mon Nov 04, 2013 11:00 pm

Oh, and when out on a date, do not -- DO NOT -- forget to be as loud and obnoxious as possible. After all, it's important to create an unnecessary scene in public, gaining the attention of everyone in your (and your woman's) direction.

Because some girls just love being showered with attention, and overkill is the best policy.
"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.
-Napoleon Bonaparte

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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby raider~joseph » Thu Nov 07, 2013 8:23 pm

FourFourSeven wrote:Oh, and when out on a date, do not -- DO NOT -- forget to be as loud and obnoxious as possible. After all, it's important to create an unnecessary scene in public, gaining the attention of everyone in your (and your woman's) direction.

Because some girls just love being showered with attention, and overkill is the best policy.


To add to this...hidden cameras. Just saying. A rule of thumb: If you can't see her, you know she isn't thinking about you. Also staring at her while she sleeps works wonders...especially if you in the room without her knowing. This adds suprise to your relationship. I mean hey! It worked for Edward Cullen! And that guy is stupid! I prefer to bring a few good luck charms when I stare at girls:

Knives, ice bags, dead cats, her dead cats(Fresh kills are best), dead dogs, her dead dogs, cufflinks, plastic bags, wire, c4(THIS IS SUPER LUCKY IF YOU CAN PULL IT OFF!), and a plan of steps of how you could theoretically kill her. Theoretically mind. You wouldn't want to kill her. That would be crazy.
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby Yuki-Anne » Thu Nov 07, 2013 9:31 pm

But this thread has been all about giving the guys great advice. Let's do some advice for the ladies:

Be clingy. Call him multiple times a day. Text him nearly constantly. Berate him loudly every time he is even slightly late, or doesn't text back within 30 seconds. Throw out all game consoles, and monitor all internet activities. Go through his wallet and always, ALWAYS check his jackets for other women's hair. These signs that you care are sure to win his heart.
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby raider~joseph » Thu Nov 07, 2013 10:03 pm

Yuki-Anne wrote:But this thread has been all about giving the guys great advice. Let's do some advice for the ladies:

Be clingy. Call him multiple times a day. Text him nearly constantly. Berate him loudly every time he is even slightly late, or doesn't text back within 30 seconds. Throw out all game consoles, and monitor all internet activities. Go through his wallet and always, ALWAYS check his jackets for other women's hair. These signs that you care are sure to win his heart.


Don't most mainstream girls do that stuff anyway?
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Re: The Definitive Thread on Dating

Postby Xeno » Fri Nov 08, 2013 9:58 am

As opposed to underground, indie, and the ever elusive contemporary electro chillhop girls.
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