The CAA Vending Machine

Spawned by the randomness of the general board, here are the threads where you can do fun, pointless things. You may test the forum's features and make signature or avatar requests. Posts made here do not go towards your post count.

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby SierraLea » Wed Jul 18, 2018 6:17 am

The vending machine disappoints by giving you ice cream. It's orange sherbert with pineapple chunks, though.

Inserts a pen which, if clicked on and off five times in quick succession, will spill ink all over the person aggravating me.
"I tell you, if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out." (Luke 19:37-40).
Exceptionally Ordinary
"No one ever made a difference by being like everyone else." P.T.Barnam
User avatar
SierraLea
 
Posts: 1255
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2012 7:57 am
Location: the epitome of laugher

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby Abassi » Sat Jul 21, 2018 12:31 am

You receive a better pen, a deadlier pen, a pen from a Bond film. Use it wisely.

*inserts a cloak and dagger*
User avatar
Abassi
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 4:39 pm
Location: In the Past

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby SierraLea » Sat Jul 21, 2018 10:11 am

Receives Loki. Really, give me two shield agents and I'm going to go Marvel on you.

Inserts net and trident.
"I tell you, if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out." (Luke 19:37-40).
Exceptionally Ordinary
"No one ever made a difference by being like everyone else." P.T.Barnam
User avatar
SierraLea
 
Posts: 1255
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2012 7:57 am
Location: the epitome of laugher

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby Abassi » Fri Aug 17, 2018 2:06 am

You get--Hades, Lord of the Underworld! Whom or what were you expecting?

*inserts this whole migraine thing*
User avatar
Abassi
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 4:39 pm
Location: In the Past

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby SierraLea » Sun Aug 19, 2018 3:12 pm

receives the cause of them, that you promptly bludgeon to death. Ah, isn't revenge-driven destruction fun?

Inserts Mr. Roger's Neighborhood.
"I tell you, if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out." (Luke 19:37-40).
Exceptionally Ordinary
"No one ever made a difference by being like everyone else." P.T.Barnam
User avatar
SierraLea
 
Posts: 1255
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2012 7:57 am
Location: the epitome of laugher

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby Abassi » Mon Aug 20, 2018 11:02 am

You receive a hard copy of that bit where Mr. Rogers talks to that lovely lady what played the Wicked Witch of the West.

*inserts moving boxes*
User avatar
Abassi
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 4:39 pm
Location: In the Past

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby TheAlbinoMoose » Mon Aug 20, 2018 12:27 pm

receives a Jury Duty notice! Fun!

*inserts one of those little bouncey balls they have at Walmart that nobody buys but all of us played with as kids when we went to Walmart, then put right back afterwards*
Do you see this gorgeous creature?
Image
That graceful profile. Those striking eyes. Behold the albino moose.
A wise man once said, "you can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose. But you can't pick your friend's nose."
User avatar
TheAlbinoMoose
 
Posts: 159
Joined: Fri Feb 14, 2014 3:16 pm
Location: My house

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby Abassi » Mon Aug 20, 2018 7:43 pm

You receive several disgruntled retail workers. Don't make eye contact, don't show fear! By heaven, don't show FEAR!!!

*inserts a resume*
User avatar
Abassi
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 4:39 pm
Location: In the Past

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby SierraLea » Tue Aug 21, 2018 7:07 pm

Receives a business card. To bad it's not from anywhere legitimate.

Inserts termite damage.
"I tell you, if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out." (Luke 19:37-40).
Exceptionally Ordinary
"No one ever made a difference by being like everyone else." P.T.Barnam
User avatar
SierraLea
 
Posts: 1255
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2012 7:57 am
Location: the epitome of laugher

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby Abassi » Thu Aug 23, 2018 11:30 am

But are they hiring? That's really the only question.

You receive a pink panther. Odd, but maybe it can sort the termites out somehow...

*inserts a mound of desert grasses*
User avatar
Abassi
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 4:39 pm
Location: In the Past

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby SierraLea » Sun Aug 26, 2018 6:22 pm

Receives a native american basket. It's got the loveliest zigzag pattern, too!

Inserts an armchair only two feet tall.
"I tell you, if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out." (Luke 19:37-40).
Exceptionally Ordinary
"No one ever made a difference by being like everyone else." P.T.Barnam
User avatar
SierraLea
 
Posts: 1255
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2012 7:57 am
Location: the epitome of laugher

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby Abassi » Tue Aug 28, 2018 7:17 pm

You receive a brownie! Not to be confused with a hob, though it may be rhymed with a knob.

*inserts a feline whisker*
User avatar
Abassi
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 4:39 pm
Location: In the Past

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby SierraLea » Tue Aug 28, 2018 10:13 pm

Receives a cougar. Don't. Run.

Inserts a bump in the night.
"I tell you, if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out." (Luke 19:37-40).
Exceptionally Ordinary
"No one ever made a difference by being like everyone else." P.T.Barnam
User avatar
SierraLea
 
Posts: 1255
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2012 7:57 am
Location: the epitome of laugher

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby Abassi » Fri Aug 31, 2018 9:42 am

You receive a wocket for your pocket.

*inserts debian linux*
User avatar
Abassi
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 4:39 pm
Location: In the Past

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby SierraLea » Sat Sep 01, 2018 12:20 pm

Receives the first Mac. Hopefully it's simpler.
Inserts half-baked cake. It's still oozing.
"I tell you, if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out." (Luke 19:37-40).
Exceptionally Ordinary
"No one ever made a difference by being like everyone else." P.T.Barnam
User avatar
SierraLea
 
Posts: 1255
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2012 7:57 am
Location: the epitome of laugher

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby Abassi » Tue Sep 04, 2018 9:33 am

With a "ding!" you receive a fully baked idea!

*inserts The End Times Times, a newspaper always headlined 'The End is Nigh!' Get your yearly subscription today!*
User avatar
Abassi
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 4:39 pm
Location: In the Past

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby SierraLea » Tue Sep 04, 2018 11:00 am

Receives "Logic for Dummies". Because if you even owned that paper in the first place, you need to take a course in reasoning.
Inserts three years of pining.
"I tell you, if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out." (Luke 19:37-40).
Exceptionally Ordinary
"No one ever made a difference by being like everyone else." P.T.Barnam
User avatar
SierraLea
 
Posts: 1255
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2012 7:57 am
Location: the epitome of laugher

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby Abassi » Wed Sep 12, 2018 11:08 pm

You receive a basset hound! Nothing accompanies pining better than a baleful hound!

*inserts the will to progress*
User avatar
Abassi
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 4:39 pm
Location: In the Past

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby SierraLea » Thu Sep 13, 2018 9:24 am

Receives the lackluster longing after the progress has been made. What's the next step?

Inserts an angry hippo goddess.
"I tell you, if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out." (Luke 19:37-40).
Exceptionally Ordinary
"No one ever made a difference by being like everyone else." P.T.Barnam
User avatar
SierraLea
 
Posts: 1255
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2012 7:57 am
Location: the epitome of laugher

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby Abassi » Tue Sep 18, 2018 12:40 am

You receive a handsome alligator with a feathered cap!

*inserts the odd hours of the morning*
User avatar
Abassi
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 4:39 pm
Location: In the Past

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby SierraLea » Tue Sep 18, 2018 7:04 am

Receives Insomnia. Because that is the only way you had those to insert in the first place.
Insert Tirimasu.
"I tell you, if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out." (Luke 19:37-40).
Exceptionally Ordinary
"No one ever made a difference by being like everyone else." P.T.Barnam
User avatar
SierraLea
 
Posts: 1255
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2012 7:57 am
Location: the epitome of laugher

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby Abassi » Tue Sep 25, 2018 1:59 pm

Aw man, now I have twice as much!

You receive boots of levitation! Now there's a *real* pick me up!

*inserts a metal filling*
User avatar
Abassi
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 4:39 pm
Location: In the Past

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby SierraLea » Wed Sep 26, 2018 10:59 am

Receives metal filings. Sorry, the filling got busted up by the internal cogs of the vending machine.
Inserts dark wash, deconstructed skinny jeans.
"I tell you, if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out." (Luke 19:37-40).
Exceptionally Ordinary
"No one ever made a difference by being like everyone else." P.T.Barnam
User avatar
SierraLea
 
Posts: 1255
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2012 7:57 am
Location: the epitome of laugher

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby Abassi » Mon Oct 01, 2018 11:44 pm

You receive a pair of genuine Renaissance trousers and a feathered hat! Truly THIS is fashion forward.

*inserts actual coinage*
User avatar
Abassi
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 4:39 pm
Location: In the Past

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby SierraLea » Tue Oct 02, 2018 9:15 pm

Receives a pack of skittles. Hey, if you're going to be boring...
Inserts lemon tart.
"I tell you, if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out." (Luke 19:37-40).
Exceptionally Ordinary
"No one ever made a difference by being like everyone else." P.T.Barnam
User avatar
SierraLea
 
Posts: 1255
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2012 7:57 am
Location: the epitome of laugher

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby Abassi » Thu Oct 11, 2018 9:32 pm

You receive the Queen of Hearts--OOOFF WITH YOUR HEAD!

*inserts the pack of skittles*
User avatar
Abassi
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 4:39 pm
Location: In the Past

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby SierraLea » Fri Oct 12, 2018 7:54 am

Receives a blinding flash in seven colors. Rainbow's gotta start somewhere.
Insert gestational diabetes.
"I tell you, if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out." (Luke 19:37-40).
Exceptionally Ordinary
"No one ever made a difference by being like everyone else." P.T.Barnam
User avatar
SierraLea
 
Posts: 1255
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2012 7:57 am
Location: the epitome of laugher

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby Abassi » Wed Oct 17, 2018 9:49 pm

You receive a rubber chicken. It's the best a vending machine can do given the circumstances.

*inserts a very small goat*
User avatar
Abassi
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 4:39 pm
Location: In the Past

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby SierraLea » Thu Oct 18, 2018 8:00 am

Receives a G.O.A.T. badge. I hear that's a thing nowadays.
Inserts wall covered in bugs.
"I tell you, if they keep quiet, the stones will cry out." (Luke 19:37-40).
Exceptionally Ordinary
"No one ever made a difference by being like everyone else." P.T.Barnam
User avatar
SierraLea
 
Posts: 1255
Joined: Sat Mar 10, 2012 7:57 am
Location: the epitome of laugher

Re: The CAA Vending Machine

Postby Abassi » Thu Nov 01, 2018 12:00 pm

I thought being called a goat was an insult!
You receive a highly skilled insect assassin, codename: C.A.T.

*inserts a steering wheel*
User avatar
Abassi
 
Posts: 26
Joined: Wed Aug 02, 2006 4:39 pm
Location: In the Past

Previous Next

Return to Goof Off and Testing

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 62 guests