I'm having some real difficulty commentening on your poems Zarn. Its not that they are bad or good, its just I can't really think of anything to say about them. It might be the length even though, content wise, there's a good bit in them like your previous ones. Welp, I'll try anyway.
Zarn Ishtare (post: 1572125) wrote:
"Some people spend an entire lifetime wondering if they made a difference in the world. But, the Marines don't have that problem". Ronald Reagan, 40th President of the United States.
Reagan you liar
the faceless legions require
you to answer me this
"were our lives meaningless?"
The poem's a good response to the quote you listed. It gets the idea you are presenting off pretty well and rather quickly. The ending doesn't leave things particularly open which is fine for something like this.
Zarn Ishtare (post: 1587026) wrote:Poetry
I wish this was a poem.
ABlipinTime (post: 1587090) wrote:There once was a poet named Zarn
who made threads as long as yarn
But coming upon page fourteen
Peanut slipped a poem in between
The once was a member called ABlipinTime
Who did his very best to rhyme
But try as he might
he couldn't get it quite right
and he missed the joke entirely.
Zarn Ishtare (post: 1590720) wrote:Everything I own
Everything I am
I'll give it all back.
I like how you did your pacing in this one. It gets to the point pretty quickly but I feel like you could do a little more with it. The context for this is so broad it maybe could use like one or two more lines. But as is its pretty good.