Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
Photosoph (post: 1200366) wrote:Sorry for my long absense.
Indigo People... Unfinished, but still very cool. I love how it starts]'Father, I have seen the Indigo People'.[/i]
I don't know why... it's just really cool. Love the thoughts and ideas in this one; people who live for the moment, but get washed away when trouble comes. Or at least that's what I see. Beautiful imagery.
Wash
'Let me clean my soiled tongue
And speak to You again.'
...Beautiful. Beautiful line.
Gulf
Love this. Especially the word 'gulf' and 'tempest toss'd. Creates a striking sort of image.
Loss of Him
Good, but it doesn't flow quite as well as some of the other poetry. Some really good lines though... 'stacked across the stone' has a really nice sound to it.
We Shall Remain
'Our hearts shall burn strong against the black night
We shall be an endless light'
I really liked this part. The last line... hm... not as impacting as these too. So, the ending was a little weaker. Just how it felt/sounded when I read it. But very nicely done.
Oh wait, sorry -I thought that was the end of the poem. Man, I love how it goes on. Especially 'We raze the Doom tonight.'; it gave me good chills. X3
Guf
Aw man! This was beautiful! Love how it starts; the repetition of 'When I' which helps lend... hm... what would be the words for it... I dunno, sort of a pause for thought or coming back to a theme. But anyway, beautiful. And then how it goes on; the way you reveal the idea behind what 'the wife in the other room' really is, and the last two spoken lines... really lovely.
Zarn Ishtare wrote:I'm not a reciting-of-my-own-poetry kind of guy, but I do take beat into account, and like to imagine someone much cooler than me reading it at the right tempo.
goldenspines wrote:Its only stealing if you don't get caught.
Peanut (post: 1203562) wrote:Well...I have finally read your entire poetry thread Zarn. The only comment which I can muster up at this point is actually rather cheesy now that I think about it...but hey, I'll say it anyway. After reading all of your poetry in this thread I feel inspired in a way that I haven't been in quite some time. It almost feels as if I am at the crossroads of a thousand ideas (poetry, prose, you name it it's probably there...) waiting to be brought to life. Anyway, I enjoyed myself quite a bit reading your poetry and I look for to your future works.
*thinks back to a certain video*
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
Photosoph (post: 1206234) wrote:Cold Mountain -that's not the same as 'Clean Mountain', is it?
("Light kissed clouds play about my perch
My feet firm on the mount of Isolation
Peaking down at the world around me
At this time of night, I need some contentment!
But all is calm in solitude's spire
All is quiet in the Loneliness of the evening
If you reached your hands towards my peak
All you'd grasp is sunshine
As these cotton-ball rain clouds pass me by
running like water from the broken vessel
flowing like thoughts from a broken mind
I reach down
and grasp all around
and with a sigh, I try and pull it down.
But no one can touch me in this world without love
no arms towards my mountains, hands raised
no voices pierce the cold spaces in the crevices
I figure myself alone in the mother of snows.
As the air escapes me
as the snows fall down on my peak of isolation
I try and grasp the light
and my hands, swallowing it
envelope me in night."
"The Clean Mountain" De Luit.)
Hm... I'll see how I go. There are a lot of nice poems, so I might just pick one.
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
Anna Mae (post: 1209207) wrote:I regret to inform all of you that I will be leaving. God has called me to mission work in Brazil and Paraguay and I may or may not return to CAA. This is my second to last login and then I'm off. It has been nice chatting with all of you. I will miss reading your poetry, Zarn.
God bless,
Anna Mae
Myoti wrote:Elementary, my dear Watsoph. XD
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 59 guests